


when i look in the mirror

by karlnapitys



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Body Dysphoria, Mentions of Eating Disorder, Multi, please do not read if any of these trigger you
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-16 10:48:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29699409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/karlnapitys/pseuds/karlnapitys
Summary: his weight had never outright been an issue for himself. sure, his thighs were not the smallest, but it never really bothered him.
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Clay | Dream/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), GeorgeNotFound/Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 83





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

> please check tags for warnings before reading

his weight had never outright been an issue for himself. sure, his thighs were not the smallest, but it never really bothered him. 

maybe it was the dono’s on some of his streams telling him he could lose weight, or maybe he just realized going to the gym wouldn’t hurt him. 

sapnap found himself staring at his body in the mirror, looking for every imperfection that he thought he had. 

his boyfriends reminded him every day of how beautiful he was, without knowing how he was feeling. but they had to say that. they were his boyfriends

sapnap stopped streaming with facecam on. he really didn’t want to show his face anywhere anymore. 


	2. the three of us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sapnap spends time with his boyfriends

his boyfriends spoke enthusiastically, goofing around with each other. sapnap grinned, a small smile appearing on his face. he loved hearing his boyfriends bicker back and forth playfully, it made his bad days better.

“sapppp!” george whined “tell dream to stop being mean, its not very nice.” 

sapnap opened his mouth, but before he could talk his stomach let out a large grumble. he shut his eyes, hoping and praying that dream and george didn’t hear that. 

“baby, have you eaten anything today?” dreams soft tone filled his ears.

his whole body sunk lower. he didn’t want to tell them he forgot to. they didn’t need to know.

“uh, no. well, i forgot to.”

“what do you mean you forgot sapnap?? you can’t just forget!” george raised his voice, making sapnap flinch back and let out a loud whine.

the call went silent, sapnap feeling like he was about to cry. he had never been yelled at by george, and frankly it scared him.

sapnap let out a sob that he tried to keep in, he didn’t want for his boyfriends to hear him cry 

“i didn’t mean to yell baby, i’m sorry.” george’s voice was laced with guilt, clearly sorry that he upset sapnap.

sapnap stared at his wall, tears still coming down his face. dreams voice brought him back to the call. “sap, i’m gonna order you some food. what do you want baby?” 

“no, no it’s okay i can get my own food.” sapnap lied through his teeth.

dream let out a heavy sigh. “i’m gonna order you food sap, and you’re gonna turn your camera on and show us you eating. you need to eat and we need to know that you ate.” 

“please dream you don’t have to i can-“ 

sapnap was cut off by dream.

“baby please. i already ordered pizza, mozzarella sticks, and onion rings for you.” 

“b- but that’s so much?”

“you need it. you haven’t eaten all day.” 

“can you turn your cam on please? i wanna see your beautiful face.” george’s voice was soft, not wanting to yell at sapnap again.

he sighed, but decided to do it. he didn’t want to upset his boys any more than he already had. leaning forward, he pressed the camera. his face broke out into a smile seeing his boys faces light up.

“there’s my beautiful boy.” dreams voice was filled with love.

“our beautiful boy, dream.” george corrected him.

sapnaps cheeks turned rosy, and a laugh escaped his lips. this is how he wanted to spend the rest of his life, with these boys.

sapnaps thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his apartment door.

he got up, walking to the door. in front of him was what he assumed to be the food deliver, so he grabbed the food and handed him a tip.

quickly he sat back down in his chair, hands full of food. “dreamy, you bought me so much.  i can’t eat this all.”

“you don’t have to. i figured you can save some as leftovers for tommorow.” 

_ you cant eat all this. the voice in his head snarled. you’re trying to lose weight, not gain it. _

“two slices of pizza won’t hurt me.” he mumbled under his breath, not loud enough for dream and george could hear. 

he opened the pizza box, taking out a piece and having a small bite. 

____________

after the second slice, he had three mozzarella sticks and then was done.

“i’m proud of you sapnap. you deserve to eat, please don’t forget that. it’s not healthy to not eat.” dream encouraged his boyfriend.

“i know. i guess i was just busy. i needed to upload a youtube video and it took a long time, eating just slipped my mind.” _that was a lie_

“okay, just promise it won’t happen again.” 

“i promise” _another_ lie. “alright i’m tired, think i’m gonna take a nap.” 

“okay baby, talk to you later. i love you.” dream spoke.

“have a good nap sappy, i love you.” georges voice was soft.

“i love you both too. i’ll talk to you later, i think i’m gonna stream tonight.” and with that he left the call, and lied down in his bed.

____________

the two sat in silence for a few moments, thinking about what had happened today.

“i’m worried about sapnap, he doesn’t seem like himself.” george broke the silence.

“i am too. but maybe he was just tired. i’m gonna keep an eye on him, i’m not gonna let him go down a rabbit hole.” dream assured george.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! next chapter will be out soon!!

**Author's Note:**

> this is inspired by let me love you by as you are ! i am not shipping irl here, but more their personas. also this is just an intro chapter, the rest will be longer.


End file.
